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Dec. 30th, 2007 05:46 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
titusnowlEverybody hates the fucking Sniper.
This is because he's a fucking ass.
The Pyro has a thing against him, because he insisted on calling her "boy," and wouldn't stop until she took off the mask and proved it - and now he won't stop saying disgusting things to her. She's about half an inch of willpower away from lighting his bed on fire with him in it.
And then, of course, there's the matter of the Spy and the Scout and some photographs.
But even setting aside these personal vendettas, he is generally ill-liked. He's paranoid delusional, and although in here, everyone really is out to get you, it still doesn't make for very good teammates, you know. The popular rumor about his past is that he killed some people out in the Outback.
And ate them.
"Fuckin' newspapers called him the Dingo, because he eats motherfucking babies - "
Everyone has a terrible secret wish down in their heart that one day the Spy will "accidentally" stab him to death.
"Eet was only a leetle cut! 'oo would think zere would be so much blood - Eet was for verisimilitude!"
The Heavy, though, he's a good guy.
As long as you don't touch Sascha.
Those barrels get red-hot over the course of a battle, you know, and the Spy once had the brilliant idea of stooping to light his cigarette from them.
Saying "brilliant" was sarcasm, yeah?
Massive meaty mitt around his arm, lifting him up to eye level - "YOU WILL NOT TOUCH SASCHA."
"Zat man," once he was out of earshot, rubbing his arm (the bruises took a day to even show up, and over a week to fade away), "'as an unnatural closeness wi' zat weapon - "
No sympathy from anybody. "He fucking told everybody not to touch his fucking gun, cockfag. You feel like dicking around with the Russian tank that is YOUR fucking issue."
Of course, the Scout had touched Sascha himself once. High-pitched hysteria cracking his voice: "I DIDN'T FUCKING HURT IT - "
"You will not touch my gun."
"OK OK I WON'T I'LL NEVER EVEN FUCKING LOOK AT IT AGAIN JUST PUT ME DOWN PLEASE"
And that is how he learned that lesson.
This is because he's a fucking ass.
The Pyro has a thing against him, because he insisted on calling her "boy," and wouldn't stop until she took off the mask and proved it - and now he won't stop saying disgusting things to her. She's about half an inch of willpower away from lighting his bed on fire with him in it.
And then, of course, there's the matter of the Spy and the Scout and some photographs.
But even setting aside these personal vendettas, he is generally ill-liked. He's paranoid delusional, and although in here, everyone really is out to get you, it still doesn't make for very good teammates, you know. The popular rumor about his past is that he killed some people out in the Outback.
And ate them.
"Fuckin' newspapers called him the Dingo, because he eats motherfucking babies - "
Everyone has a terrible secret wish down in their heart that one day the Spy will "accidentally" stab him to death.
"Eet was only a leetle cut! 'oo would think zere would be so much blood - Eet was for verisimilitude!"
The Heavy, though, he's a good guy.
As long as you don't touch Sascha.
Those barrels get red-hot over the course of a battle, you know, and the Spy once had the brilliant idea of stooping to light his cigarette from them.
Saying "brilliant" was sarcasm, yeah?
Massive meaty mitt around his arm, lifting him up to eye level - "YOU WILL NOT TOUCH SASCHA."
"Zat man," once he was out of earshot, rubbing his arm (the bruises took a day to even show up, and over a week to fade away), "'as an unnatural closeness wi' zat weapon - "
No sympathy from anybody. "He fucking told everybody not to touch his fucking gun, cockfag. You feel like dicking around with the Russian tank that is YOUR fucking issue."
Of course, the Scout had touched Sascha himself once. High-pitched hysteria cracking his voice: "I DIDN'T FUCKING HURT IT - "
"You will not touch my gun."
"OK OK I WON'T I'LL NEVER EVEN FUCKING LOOK AT IT AGAIN JUST PUT ME DOWN PLEASE"
And that is how he learned that lesson.
